Ask Dali Mama

DEAR DALI MAMA:

My wife and I have a young daughter. My wife is kind of anti-social and always has a reason for not liking or hanging out with everyone: She’s too talkative or he chews too loud or she’s too slutty or whatever other bogus excuse to exclude people. Now that my daughter’s getting ready to go to school, I worry about this affecting her. Will she not be able to play with people because something’s not good enough about the other kids or the other kids’ moms? How should I handle this?

–Worried Dad (Australia)

DEAR WORRIED DAD:

Good awareness of noticing these dynamics. Your wife is modeling behavior to your daughter of judging people and pushing them away. Perhaps you can model a different kind of behavior: a more social, positive kind of behavior of both appreciation the qualities of different people and also giving each person space to be exactly who they are. Perhaps you could also organize some small play dates with other parents and maybe even have a party at some point (maybe for your daughter’s birthday), inviting all of the kids from her class along with their parents for a potluck.