I am in the process of changing my life. I have been divorced for 12 years and I think I am finally ready to start dating again. I know I’ve let myself dress frumpy all these years since my husband left and I want to create a whole new style but I feel scared. I don’t know why. Any suggestions on how to create a new style?

–Almost Stylin’ (United States)


Congratulations on changing your life. You might feel scared because, by letting go of your old frumpy style, you’re stepping out into the world and allowing yourself to connect with people as a woman who is willing to be seen (and even admired).

Cut out photos from magazines of women whose style you admire. Think about what elements of the styles you like and how you can start to incorporate those elements into your own style.

Next, take the photos of outfits of women who have a similar body type to you and notice what makes those outfits work.

Then, I suggest inviting one of your stylish friends to lunch and asking them if they’d help you pick out some simple wardrobe staples that flatter you. It always helps to have a neutral eye and someone who can guide you to things you might not think of trying on. You might even start by shopping in your closet to see what you have that would work for you. And donate whatever doesn’t. Once you have the basic pieces you need, you can add color and other elements, perhaps even with accessories you already have.

Pick things you feel comfortable in but also allow yourself to go outside of your comfort zone now and then while you’re exploring what your unique style is that both flatters and uplifts you and allows the true you to shine.

Most importantly, let yourself play and have fun expressing your true self through your new style.

Have fun and let yourself shine!

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