Ask Dali Mama

DEAR DALI MAMA:

My three kids are all in sports at school and are so competitive, even at video games or board games. It’s almost scary. How do I foster more teamwork and less competitiveness among them?

—Mother of the Lords of the Flies

DEAR MOTHER:

Thank you for this question.

You might want to encourage them to play games that require teamwork instead of game that pit each other against one another. I don’t know how old your kids are so maybe you could google “noncompetitive board games” and see what comes up that is appropriate for your children’s ages and needs. There are also a couple sites, https://cooperativegames.com/ and http://www.lifescript.com/well-being/articles/t/tools_for_building_teamwork_at_home.aspx, that you might want to check out.

You (and your spouse/partner) might also want to play with noncompetitive language and language that isn’t goal oriented. For example, instead of “You are the best goalie ever,” you could say something like, “You really paid attention to all the balls coming in.”

Warm wishes to you! Your kids are lucky.