Ask Dali Mama

DEAR DALI MAMA:

How do you determine if the way you treat your money is right? I mean, how can I judge or neutrally observe my relationship to both spending and saving my money?

I have always lived a sheltered life and only have a strict family to compare myself to as regards money. My family is frugal which funnily pushes me in the opposite direction and I overspend and don’t give a fig, even when I perhaps should.

—Curious (Canada)

DEAR CURIOUS:

Thanks for your awareness on your spending habits. Often when we resist something (like our family pushing us to be frugal), we can go in the opposite direction, even when it’s not in our best interest.

Perhaps you could try making a list of your top 10 priorities—health, education, career, etc. And just for a month, write down every single amount you spend and what you spent it on. Notice then whether your spending reflects your true priorities and you can choose to make adjustments accordingly.

Notice, too, as you are thinking of spending money—in what energy are you spending it? For example, are you wanting to buy something out of a feeling of wanting to self-soothe to make yourself feel better for a moment? Or are you wanting to spend money out of a feeling of lack—like you’ll miss out and never have the chance for something again if you don’t buy that thing now? Or are you making the decision to buy something from a space of awareness and empowerment where you know you have the money and choose to buy something because you know it will add to your life’s mission and priorities.

Have fun exploring this! Thanks for being curious!