I moved with my husband to a different country three years ago but I still don’t really have any friends here. I am shy and it is hard for me to meet people. Sometimes people have parties but they don’t invite me. How do I make friends?

—Lonely in a New Country (Hong Kong)


You may be lonely right now but I guarantee that you are not alone in feeling lonely and feeling like it is hard to meet people.

Perhaps you could look on to see if there are any local groups you’re interested in. They have all different topics—film, hiking, dancing, writing, international societies, and much more. Many cities also have local clubs that are listed in the paper. You could also perhaps reach out to the wives of your husband’s friends and extend a friendly hand.

If people have parties but don’t invite you, how about hosting a party yourself? It’s a great way to show your interest in developing friendships with people and you’d probably make someone’s day who is also feeling a little lonely and isolated.



I am a medium and having worked on myself for forever, you would think I would be free of negative attachments (spirits). However, there is one spirit in particular that tries to upset me and it manages to do just that.

It feeds off my need for “external romantic love” and company and comes in and imitates loving energies very similar to those of my partner. It is very conniving and good at getting me off track.  It also knows I get angry at its presence and plays on that. I’m losing the will to live here! I have tried EVERYTHING to get rid of it.

Being an amazing medium, can you see anything I can’t see regarding why it’s here? Maybe I’m doing something wrong as surely there’s a reason it’s still hanging around? Please help.

—On My Last Nerve (Bolivia)



We are all in process, no matter how long we’ve worked on ourselves (and that includes past lives).

Spirits are just like people, who are of course spirits in human bodies. There’s a saying, “What we resist, persists.” Anything we resist energetically keeps sticking around or we’ll manage to get rid of something and something of a similar vibration comes along. For example, if a student is being bullied at school, the more he resists, the more the bully may bother him and may even escalate. However, once the student learns to get neutral to the bully and starts to have more of his true power, the bully will generally find someone else to go persecute. This is of course easier said than done but it is possible with practice and retraining of your attitudes to learn to get neutral to what you are resisting.

Another example is when dealing with energy vampires, people who suck and suck and suck our energy, whether they are narcissists or people who try to ingratiate themselves, then pester to get some kind of reaction and to pull energy from you, even if it negative attention. Once you stop resisting them and give them space to be without giving them any attention, they generally tire and go suckle the energy from someone else, whether that is by charming them or creating drama or pretending to be helpless, or whatever techniques they use to suck energy.

Keep your focus on what’s important to you. Since you want love and good company, use your energy to take practical steps like joining a meetup group for a topic that interests you (hiking or art or movies or whatever) or just get a group of friends together and encourage them to bring their nice friends as well. You’ll meet people, have fun, and who knows what else? And your focus will be on creating positive things you want rather than giving your energy to this spirit or your worries or any negative people or anything else you don’t really want in your life.

Good on you for your awareness and making these changes!



I am a woman in her mid-40s and I feel my libido is low. It’s been that way for some time. What can cause this and how do I boost my libido?

–Low Libido (Canada)


First, check with your doctor. He or she might want to do some tests, including a hormone test, which can affect your libido. If your low libido has medical causes, there are always allopathic or naturopathic treatments you can try.

Also, I recommend you do more activities to foster passion in your life. If time flies when you’re painting, take a painting class. If you get an adrenal rush performing, try doing music or comedy at open-mic night at your local café. Do something that feels a little scary but fun.

If you are single, go meet new people. You can meet nice folks in groups through places like Meeting new and interesting people can reawaken your spark, even if it is simply making new platonic friends. It’s also important to rev up your sexual energy to get it flowing more. Perhaps you could find some tasteful erotic literature or movies to get the energy moving. You might want to also invest in a vibrator and use it every day, even if you’re not that into it at first. It’ll at least start to get the energy moving gradually in your sexual space. The more you feed your sexual energy and space, the stronger it’ll get.

If you are in a relationship, try spicing things up together. Go out like you’re on a first date and flirt madly with each other and make each other laugh, forbidding each other to talk about the groceries or the laundry or the kids or the car needing a tune-up. Tell each other what you find sexy about each other. Maybe even go on a double-date with some new friends and see things about your partner from fresh eyes and remember why you fell in love with your partner in the first place.


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